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Post by GundamZero on Mar 12, 2005 21:45:37 GMT -5
I know. I personally think it'd be more gruesome watching Aisha kill Jaken, due to her natural ferocity.
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Post by Stamen on Mar 18, 2005 21:36:07 GMT -5
No duh.... Koga could really rip him apart, too.
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Post by GundamZero on Mar 18, 2005 22:32:23 GMT -5
He'd get his sorry little @$$ kicked by anyone in the show. Heck, even Shippo could take him out, if he didn't have his staff.
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Post by GundamZero on Mar 30, 2005 15:22:51 GMT -5
Have him take on Roy Mustang!
Jaken: "Feel my staff's power, human!!!!!!!!!" *unleashes his staff's flames* Mustang: *snickers* "Are you finished yet? Good. Now, let me show you the real way to use fire.......ALCHEMY!!!!" *clenches his right hand into a fist and aims his hand at Jaken* Jaken: "Oh no..........HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Sesshomaru: "Good riddance, Jaken." *Jaken tries to run* Hawkeye: *aims one of her guns at Jaken* "Where do you think YOU'RE going?" Jaken: "Nooooooooooooooooooo..........." Mustang: "Riza, please move, so I don't torch you. Hawkeye: "Sure, Roy." *moves aside* Mustang: "DIE, YOU LITTLE TWERP!!!!!!!!!!"*unleashes his flame alchemy* Jaken: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"*cut off as he burns to oblivion.*
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Post by Stamen on Mar 30, 2005 22:31:21 GMT -5
Jaken: "Die, and forever bond to your armor!!" *flames shoot out of his staff*
Al: *flames torch the suit, then diminish* "I don't think you understand the situation you're in...."
Jaken: "What?! You're still alive?! How is that possible?!"
Al: *removes headpiece, no head or body visible*
Jaken: *goes cold* "WHHAAAAATTTTTT?!?!?! HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?!?!"
Al: "Bye Bye!" *slams his fist into Jaken's face*
Jaken: "AAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!........... *speck on the horizon*
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Post by GundamZero on Mar 31, 2005 9:31:17 GMT -5
Haha.........UUFT (Ugly Unidentified Flying Toad!)
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Post by Stamen on Apr 2, 2005 0:13:19 GMT -5
LMAO!!! ;D
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Post by GundamZero on Apr 2, 2005 6:28:20 GMT -5
Ditto.
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Post by GundamZero on Apr 23, 2005 21:31:25 GMT -5
3 new ways to kill Jaken, all of them involving SERIOUS pain!
Round 1: Jaken vs. Botan:
Jaken: "Time to die, human! FEEL THE POWER OF THE STAFF OF TWO SKULLS!!!!!!!!" *unleashes his staff's flame stream* Botan: "I don't think so! SPIRIT FIRE SHIELD!!!!!" *a wall of glowing blue flames surrounds Botan, shielding her* Jaken: "What the hell?.........." Botan: "My turn!"*readies her oar* Jaken: "Oh sh!t........." Botan: "FORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"*smashes Jaken as hard as she can, splattering him into a tree.* Jaken: *groans* "Ouch............"*dies* Botan: "Annoying little pest......."*flies off on her oar*
Round 2: Jaken vs. Duke Nukem: Jaken: "Prepare to die, human!"*readies his staff* Duke: "Hehe.........you're gonna die first!!!!!"*pulls out Desert Eagle and aims at Jaken* Jaken: "What the hell is that thing?" Duke: "Hey, ugly, let's play a game. It's called 'I shoot and you die!' " Jaken: "Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo..........." Duke: "Kiss your @$$ goodbye!!!!!!!"*fires* Jaken: "Agggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!".............*turned into a blood smear by the supersonic parabellum Magnum round* Duke: "Awwwwwwwww........I'm sorry.........did that hurt?" *rides off on his '68 Harley Davidson Custom, and goes through the time portal back to his own era*
Round 3: Jaken vs. "Twilight" Suzuka: Jaken: "What the.........who are you?" Suzuka: "My name is none of your concern. What you do with your last five minutes of life is." Jaken: "What do you mean?" Suzuka: "I am here to fulfill a contract given to me by Inuyasha and Kagome, for when you attempted to attack Shippo the other day." Jaken: "Oh, sh!t" Suzuka: "Your time is up. Prepare to die."*readies her Bokuto* Jaken: "Noooooooooooooooooo..................." *Suzuka charges at Jaken and slashes him 5 times in 10 seconds, turning him into crouton-sized bits* Suzuka: "Another contract fulfilled. Now to collect my pay, and then I'm going to rejoin Gene and the others."
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Post by GundamZero on Jul 7, 2005 7:46:03 GMT -5
Put him up against the Freedom Gundam and watch him get fried!
Jaken: *sees a large shadow overhead* "What the.........." Kira: "Jaken, time to die!" Jaken: "Huh.......who the hell are you?" Kira: "None of your business. I'm just here to kick your ugly @$$." Jaken: "Oh no........" Kira: *arms the Freedom Gundam's weapons and aims at Jaken* "Kiss your @$$ goodbye!" Jaken: "HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Kira: "So long, ugly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" *fires* Jaken: "Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.............AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"*atomized* Lacus: "Great shot, Kira!"*kisses him* Kira: *kisses her back* "Thanks, Lacus. Let's go home" Lacus: "Sure."
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Post by Stamen on Jul 11, 2005 21:49:22 GMT -5
Kick@$$!!!!
I have a better idea..... Lets have him go against the ZGMF-X09A Justice and the ZGMF-X10A Freedom Gundams when they've got the METEOR units equipped!!!!!
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Post by GundamZero on Jul 12, 2005 11:35:35 GMT -5
Jaken: *sees two large shadows* "What the hell is going on here?" Kira: "You're dead meat, ugly!" Athrun: "Don't even try and run. It's all over for you." Jaken: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" *tries to run away* *Kira and Athrun blast him with a full salvo from both of their METEOR units* Jaken: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"*atomized*
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Post by Stamen on Jul 13, 2005 21:47:22 GMT -5
Jaken: *multiplies self at the last minute* Jakens: "HA! I'd like to see you try to find the real me!!" Kira and Athrun: "NO PROBLEM" *activates multiple lock feature. Crosshairs completely flood the screens of the Freedom and Justice Gundams. Every single Jaken there is locked onto.* Jakens: "HAHAHA!!! HAVING PROBLEMS FINDING ME?!" Kira: "Actually,...." Athrun: "....you're all clearly visible as the sun!!!" Kira and Athrun: "NOW DIE, ALL OF YOU!!!!" *full fire from both METEOR units* Jakens: "WHAT?! THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE!!! AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.............................."
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Post by GundamZero on Jul 13, 2005 21:55:34 GMT -5
Ooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh............toad wallpaper!
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Post by GundamZero on Jul 16, 2005 13:01:43 GMT -5
Have him go up against the Burning and Rising Gundams at the same time!
*Jaken has just pulled his body out of the ground, after Sesshomaru stomped him into the dirt, and is about to run off to catch up, when he suddenly hears loud footsteps behind him*
Jaken: "W-w-w-Who's th-there?" Domon: "I am the King of Hearts, Champion of the 13th Gundam Fight, and leader of the Shuffle Alliance, Domon Kasshu." Rain: "I'm Rain Mikamura, his wife, doctor, and mechanic of the Neo-Japan team." Jaken: "What the hell are you doing here?" Domon: "I'm going to kick your pathetic little @$$ in!" Rain: "Likewise!" Jaken: "HAH! Just try it! FEEL THE POWER OF THE STAFF OF TWO SKULLS!!!!!!!!!" *the flames hit the two gundams, sheeting harmlessly off of the armor* Jaken: "T-T-That's impossible! You should both be dead!" Rain: "Too bad for you, our gundams are nearly indestructible." Domon: "Rain, let's take this guy out." Rain: "Right. I'm ready any time you are, Domon." *the Burning and Rising Gundams join hands, just like Domon and Rain did in Ep. 49 of G-Gundam* Domon and Rain: "THESE HANDS OF OURS ARE BURNING RED!!!!!"*the Burning Gundam's chest opens up, the fins on it's back move into position, and the armor guards move into position over the fists, and the Rising Gundam goes into Hyper Mode, along with the Burning Gundam* Domon: "THEIR LOUD CRY TELLS US........." Rain: ".......TO GRASP HAPPINESS!!!!!!!!"*both gundams' hands start glowing* Domon and Rain: "ERUPTING BURNING FINGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Jaken: "Oh, sh!t!!!!!!!!" Domon: "SEKI.........." Rain:"HA..................." Domon and Rain: "LOVE LOVE TENKYOKEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Jaken: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.........AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"*atomized* *Domon and Rain get out of their cockpits* Rain: "Nice going, Domon! You got him!" Domon: *hugs Rain* "No, Rain. WE got him, together." Rain: *blushes, then hugs him back* "Let's go home." Domon: "Sure." *They get back in their Gundams* *the Burning and Rising Gundams fly back through the temporal anomaly that dumped them into Feudal Japan, and go back to their own era.*
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